Beyond Survival: Embracing Bigger Dreams
What are your plans after high school? It’s exciting to hear the responses from your classmates or children as they share their dreams and aspirations. Whether it’s heading to a prestigious university, enrolling in trade school, or studying abroad, the excitement is infectious. Each student’s response typically reflects their unique vision for a fulfilling career and life.
Survival
But what about those from lower socioeconomic backgrounds? My uncle shared that most of his classmates in Mexico dreamed of either working at the local Ingenio (sugar mill) or moving to the U.S. to pursue the American Dream. The sugar mill processed sugar cane and was the town’s primary source of revenue. The pay was slightly above average, included good benefits, and a pension plan, but the work was labor-intensive. Why settle for something like this, and not dream bigger?
Those individuals understood their family’s circumstances and, in order to get by, needed to settle for the best outcomes available. When facing adversity and doing everything to survive, long-term goals and personal fulfillment often take a backseat. After all, how can you dream big when your focus is on bringing the next meal to the table for your family?
For me, my initial dream was simple: to pursue college, earn an education, and secure a well-paying job to help my family achieve financial stability. Like my uncle’s classmates, my aspirations were rooted in survival, just at a different scale. I wasn’t envisioning a career that brought fulfillment. My focus was narrow, fixated on the goal of getting through school. Growing up in a low-income environment, day-to-day concerns dominated my thoughts. It took a lot of reflection—exploring my values, building financial stability, and learning about financial planning—to begin dreaming beyond mere survival. Even now, I continue to work on this, ensuring I don’t limit my aspirations.
I recently attended a webinar by behavioral finance expert Daniel Crosby, who spoke about goal-based investing. He noted, “Until you have enough safety, you’re not worried about love, friendships, self-actualization, or the meaning of life.” This insight resonated deeply with me, particularly in my work with first-generation wealth builders.
Having worked with this group, I’ve noticed the challenges associated with a survival mindset. Many individuals in this group struggle to articulate their goals, often because their focus has been rooted in day-to-day survival. Even after overcoming significant hardships, they find themselves financially stable, but the time spent in survival mode can lead to a limiting perspective on their potential.
They may work tirelessly, yet feel like they’re never quite reaching their potential. Even if they didn’t experience these struggles firsthand, witnessing their parents’ relentless focus on survival could influence their mindset, so it’s understandable if you’ve never thought about values and self-actualization. In the hustle of everyday life, aspirations can be sidelined, leaving little space for dreaming about what could be.
Dreaming Bigger
So how do you dream beyond mere survival when you’ve faced hunger, and hardship, yet now find yourself in a place of financial stability? (And if you’re still seeking that stability, stay tuned for a future blog post!)
For many, myself included, the relentless hustle can leave little time for contemplating the bigger picture. That’s why I love financial planning—it allows for deep conversations about what truly matters. I guide clients through exercises that help them articulate their mission and vision statements. Here are some ways you can start thinking about the bigger picture:
Values Exercise: Have you discussed your core values with a partner or a trusted advisor? Identify your top five values and reflect on what each means to you.
Are these values evident in your spending plan? For example, one of my core values is health, so including a line item for my boxing coach is essential!
Have you written down your specific goals? Get really specific if it’s something you truly want to work toward—set a timeline and dig into the details. For example, if buying a home is on your list, think about how many bedrooms you want, the square footage, and what neighborhood appeals to you.
Also, take a moment to challenge these goals: where did they come from? Were they influenced by someone else, or do they genuinely reflect your desires?
As I mentioned, discussing goals can be challenging—especially when they feel unattainable because you’ve spent your whole life navigating survival. That’s why I break it down into different sections:
Personal Goals: What do you want to achieve personally? This could include losing weight, spending more time with your children, or being more present.
Professional Goals: What are your career aspirations? These could include switching careers or pursuing a new degree.
Financial Goals: These can overlap with your personal and professional goals, but also include specific objectives like buying a house or pursuing financial independence.
Finally, after addressing these three areas, reflect on any goals you didn’t include because they seem unattainable. I often ask clients, “Now think about all the dreams you’ve held back from mentioning because they feel out of reach. What are your dreams?”
Now, let’s tackle the miracle question: think about your current problems—financial or personal. Imagine waking up one morning to find them all magically gone. How do you feel? What does your life look like? What goals can you now pursue that those issues were holding you back from?"
As you reflect on your journey and the challenges you've faced, consider how far you've come and the dreams that still lie ahead. It’s essential to take all of the insights shared and craft your vision and mission statement, placing it somewhere visible in your daily life. There’s no right or wrong answer—this is your life. Remember, you have the power to dream beyond mere stability. Embrace the possibility of a fulfilling life that aligns with your values and aspirations. Envision the life you desire, and start taking steps toward making those dreams a reality!
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